If I painted my turtle black, would it be spooky?

rizzointhebox @ 2008-09-28T15:55:00

2008-09-28T23:01:36Z

I think the only good thing about my grandparents house never having ANY food is that I'm slowly starving myself thin.

I don't know what they eat for dinner when I'm at school! All we have is beans, spaghetti, and sometimes chicken..

It's all a mystery to me.

rizzointhebox @ 2008-09-12T11:24:00

2008-09-12T18:33:28Z

My birthday was lonely. I didn't do anything.

I worked, went to school, and hung out with Ryan and my grandparents. They are all pretty awesome though :)

I'm coming home this weekend and I'm excited to spend some quality shopping time with my sister! I am also determined to hang out with Catey because it's been like.. a month since we last saw each other :(

My baby will be ready on September 30th, and I'm going to go visit and play with all three on tuesday or thursday. They are so cute, it's unbearable.

I should be doing my makeup and getting ready for my last MRI at UCDMC... my appt is at one and Paul wants me to be there early.

Ryan is still amazing. I love him more than words could possibly say. He got to meet both my aunts this past weekend, and they adored him. So much in fact, that he's going to be coming to Paris with us in March! We're opening a joint savings account to save up for the trip.

Back to crazy Benicia tomorrow!

Good news!

2008-09-10T03:41:49Z

So... I was given the choice of some ice or a baby chinchilla.

And since Ryan is such a sweetheart..

I GET BOTH!

As long as my grandparents are okay with me having the baby chinchilla :)

He's amazing.

Hmmmmmm

2008-09-07T18:16:59Z

Okay. So for my birthday Ryan is giving me a choice:

A piece of diamond jewelry

OR

2 adorable 5-month-old chinchillas that we found on Craigslist. They're brothers! So cute.

I really love sparkly things. But I am also a sucker for the cute and cuddly. This is going to be a really tough decision. I know I should just say diamonds but these chinchillas seriously make me melt.

Aggghhhhhhh the indecisiveness.

rizzointhebox @ 2008-08-30T20:28:00

2008-08-31T04:00:20Z

Sacramento has been amazing. Even though it's hotter than hell and can be really ghetto in certain parts, this is the first time in YEARS that I have been stress-free on a day to day basis. It's a refreshing start with a new school, new job, new friends. I definitely miss the few friends back home though :(

CATEY'S VISITING NEXT WEEKEND YES!

I have a new phone number, it'll be activated in a few days after my old contract is finished. I'm not going to post it on here for fear that certain people still lurk on my livejournal. The harassment has stopped, but I'm not going to open any doors for it to happen again.. But yeah, just letting you all know! I'll text it to everyone in my phonebook.

I still feel all weird from that. I feel like anyone who was acquainted with Jamela now has to dislike me because of a ton of drama. I don't really know where I stand with anyone I was friendly with before shit hit the fan (because I know how word spreads around). What blows is that she talked major shit about every single girl in her "group".. her best friend even. Pretty malicious stuff sometimes.. Probably about me too. If you know her, it's a guarantee something has been said. Yet I still feel like I'm the ultimate scapegoat for getting fed up with everything and ending the friendship. It's just interesting.

I shouldn't care what people say or think.

I feel like I've done a good job at taking the trash out, in my life. I'm far enough away from my dad so that he can't go psycho on me, but close enough to keep the peace. I have eliminated all toxic friends. I found an awesome non-profit company to work for with awesome perks. Ryan and I have never been happier and everyday I am thankful that we overcame our obstacles. Not too shabby :)

How is everyone?? As far as school, work, and other stuff goes. Let me hear it!

rizzointhebox @ 2008-08-29T10:05:00

2008-08-29T17:18:53Z

I think I get paid today. I reeeeeeally need to get my nails done. It's been forever and they look like crap. I miss having sister nails. hahah.

First I'm going to have to do some research on the nail salons in Sac so I don't get some weird nail funk or crappy acrylics.

I don't have work or school until tuesday! Glorious.

Last night Ryan and I went to the most amazing Mexican place down J Street.. it seriously rivals any place in the Bay Area. I started talking to the manager about how obsessed I am with his burritos and told him about yelp.com so he can go and see the good reviews people are giving his restaurant. He ended up liking us so much that he paid for our dinner! We struck a deal that we would go put brochures for his restaurant in the Sac State dorms throughout the year. Free food just for that? Yes, please.

I was amused when he joked that I should do PR for him, because.... that's my major. At least I know I'm on the right path, hahah.

Time to get ready for wooooorrrrrk...

The downside to moving.

2008-08-28T21:00:46Z

I successfully switched out of my horrible math class into one that is a little less scary.

Work has been going well so far.

I'm really depressed that I'm not 21.

ALL my friends up here are well over 21... I just got invited to Tanya's 28th birthday. We're going to be celebrating at a restaurant/lounge and I wish I didn't have to stress about not being able to get in. My other friend Crystal is 24 and we both live in Rancho Cordova. It just sucks not being old enough to go out to bars or clubbing with the girls. I'd feel better about calling them up to go out if I had more options for places to go.

It especially sucks when you just moved to a new city and don't have too many friends in the first place.

Oh, and did I mention that all my new co-workers are over 21?

I HATE THIS. The next year is just going to be pure hell.

rizzointhebox @ 2008-08-26T10:49:00

2008-08-26T17:55:38Z

Yesterday was my first day at my new job. It was pretty awesome. The place is really laid back and it's a good spot for people-watching: right in front of the Capital. The location is absolutely gorgeous in downtown Sacramento.

Went to my math class yesterday afternoon and I am seriously terrified. I don't like my teacher and I think I'm going to have a really hard time with this class. There's really no other time that I can take the course though so it looks like I'm stuck with a bad teacher! He has an accent so it's kind of hard to understand him and he's all "We're not going to spend very much time reviewing because you need to already know this stuff like the back of your hand. And everything's going to get ten times harder in a month".

I don't know what to do... drop the class and find something else to take because I'm petrified? Or stick with it and risk getting a C... which would mean my dad stops paying for college. I've got to face this math class sooner or later. But I'm just never going to be ready.

But whatever, yay for finding a job!

rizzointhebox @ 2008-08-23T23:38:00

2008-08-24T06:41:54Z

I am drunk. Off of Jameson whiskey.

I am naked. Innnn the computer chair.

And Ryan and I are singing "County Roads" by John Denver to his acoustic guitar. wE SOUND DAMN GOOD!

I wish I were 21 or had a fake i.d. so I oculd go to the japanese karaoke bar around the corner from mh house. Oh my god we would be amazing.

I think we're gonna watch Old School now...

rizzointhebox @ 2008-08-22T14:21:00

2008-08-22T21:28:11Z

I still haven't recieved a call back from Peets Coffee. If I don't hear from them by tonight, that means I didn't get the job.. My interviewers really liked me but I know my references aren't going to be so good.

Seriously, why is it such an involved process to work in a coffee shop for $8.00 an hour? My grandpa brought this up, and I think he has a good point. I don't see why they are such a tough hire.

On the bright side, I had another second interview at this coffee shop right in front of the capital called Chicory Coffee and Tea. So if Peets doesn't work out, hopefully they will. Their interview was WAY less intense.

Chiropractor was awesome. He seemed like he knew what he was doing and addressed all my problems.. even ones that I didn't mention to him! It was like magic, he knew every single spot on my body that hurt. I wish I had the money to start going to him, but I need to get a job before I can go any further and fix anything. Chiropractors are expensive!

Besides job hunting and whatnot, Sacramento is really lonely. I don't really have any friends up here. I feel disconnected from Catey, it's been forever since we last talked :( Ryan doesn't have any time for me, so I barely see him. My cheer friends are still around, but it's hard to make plans. I just wish I had someone to go to coffee with and talk..

WHY?

2008-08-21T05:15:30Z

Because I didn't listen to my fucking gut feeling about that jerkoff History teacher, that D he gave me brought my GPA down to a 2.59!!!!!!

2.59!!!! I have to apply to Sacramento State this semester! HOW THE FUCK AM I GOING TO GET INTO COLLEGE WITH A CURRENT 2.59 GPA?! Now I don't have any time at all to bring my GPA back up before applying. My dad told me anything less than a 3.0 and they won't accept me.

I'm fucked. Totally fucked because of that bastard. God it's my fault for not getting out of the class sooner. Now I have to live with this...

My second interview at Peets went really well. I think I might just get the job. Now they just have to check my references. God I hate that part.. If the SF Creamery throws me under the bus I will be giving them a very angry phone call, because I was a great employee. It sucks that I'll never be able to put Kids K on my resume because Megan and Lindsay suck giant black herpes infested cock.

Well I guess if I get hired at Peets I can just be a loser and work there for the rest of my life since I'm not getting into college anymore.

I'm so upset about this I could cry.

rizzointhebox @ 2008-08-19T15:15:00

2008-08-19T22:25:24Z

Sooo I went on an interview for Peets Coffee today.

And..

I got a second interview! I don't know if that's good or bad. I was spying on other interviews while waiting for my turn, and the lady didn't tell anyone to come back. My interview went okay, I was really friendly and perky. But at times I would stumble over my sentences or repeat myself awkwardly. I interviewed with the district manager so it was kind of intimidating. Then I made a mistake and assumed that Peets sold The Republic of Tea, when they don't. *forehead slap*. Yeah, I looked like an idiot.

Sooo tomorrow I interview again with a guy named Don and I am going to fix all the mistakes I made today and be absolutely AMAZING. I hope. I really, really want this job. They give their part-time employees benefits! (Minimum 25 hrs) How cool is that?!

While I was waiting for my interview this young guy came up and asked me if these cute chihuahuas next to me were mine. I said no but I wished they were. We started talking and he said he was a chiropractor and his office was a few blocks away. Then I started talking about ballet and my bad hip and he said he would give me a consultation and examination for $15 instead of the regular $75. Hellooooooo! He said to call him within a week if I wanted one.

I've never been, but I think I might go. If I can improve the pain in my hip, it would be worth it.

rizzointhebox @ 2008-08-17T22:19:00

2008-08-18T05:30:16Z

OMG I have black hair!!!

I think I like it :)

rizzointhebox @ 2008-08-16T21:51:00

2008-08-17T04:51:54Z

I NEED A JOB!

So bad. Who would think that jobs would be so scarce in Sacramento?

This really blows. I need to find one before the end of the month before I go broke..

rizzointhebox @ 2008-08-15T11:49:00

2008-08-15T18:55:14Z

Went and saw Pineapple Express. Soooooo funny. Everyone should see it. I am definitely buying it when it comes out on video.

Even though James Franco plays a drug dealer in his pajamas he is still incredibly sexy. I was drooling throughout the entire movie. I felt kinda creepy.

I kept telling Ryan I wanted to hit that shit. I wouldn't blame him if he did too. hahaha

More job hunting today! Places to go:

- Chicory Coffee and Tea
- Relles Florist
-Chanel/Louis Vuitton boutique
-Juicy Couture at Arden Fair

Ready...set.... GO!

I HATE job hunting.

2008-08-14T01:48:20Z

Isn't it awful? It seems like when you really need a job, there aren't any around.

I was driving back to Rancho Cordova from hunting around on Sunrise Blvd and I saw a brand new Hooters off the freeway. I instantly got off and flipped back around going the other direction and decided to give it a shot.

Armed with my resume, I walk up to the entrance and see all these "Hooters Girls in-training" postings on the window. I realize the restaurant hasn't opened yet, but they already picked out their Hooters girls. (DAMMIT). I decide to give it a shot anyway and one of the managers lets me fill out an application and attach my resume. They said that in a week or so after they open on Monday they might have a few openings if some of the girls quit.

While I'm filling out my application I start looking around at all the girls. And most of them aren't attractive or professional at all!! Bad skin, stomachs are bigger than their boobs are, pajama pants, etc. I was horrified. I mean honestly WHAT THE HELL. I guess that's Sacramento for you..

I know that I am definitely no supermodel, but I do know that I'm at least a good server and dress professionally when I go out job hunting. It just really sucks walking in too late and knowing that I could have had a decent shot against the competition had I applied sooner. I feel like I'm never going to get hired anywhere. I know that Hooters isn't classy or anything, but the novelty aspect of it makes it a very good restaurant to make money at. I just hate missing those tiny windows of opportunity!

This really sucks.

I love my sweetie

2008-08-13T18:54:34Z

I made the most AMAZING blueberry-blackberry pie last night. We had it with vanilla ice cream and it was heavenly. Ryan ate 2 slices and the rest of mine! I was proud of myself.

Earlier that day I went to see his new dorm at Sac State and I was so excited to finally be able to kiss him again. I hadn't seen him since Friday and I missed him so much.

He is just the most amazing guy I have ever known. He's such a great boyfriend, so kind and loving and attentive. I wouldn't trade him for anything on this earth. He brought me presents back from Carmel and I felt so guilty.. I'm not used to receiving gifts and stuff so I feel bad about myself for accepting them sometimes. He found a Lush shop while he was down there and remembered how much I love their products, so he bought me my two favorite bath bombs: Sex bomb and Bathos, along with some salt water taffy. When a guy makes an effort to remember your favorite girly products, he's a keeper.

And.. it didn't stop there. We went to Arden Fair and of course I had to go into Sephora to look around because I'm a junkie. I was looking at this $60 brush set and contemplating on whether or not to buy it, when Ryan just snatches it out of my hands and starts making a bee line to the cash register. I tried to talk him out of it, but he ended up buying the set! I'm still in disbelief. Nobody has every spent that much money on me just on a whim. I still can't help but feel guilty, like I don't deserve for him to do things like that.

I'm not used to having a boyfriend who buys me nice things. He doesn't need to do it, but I am so grateful and appreciative of all that he's done.

I think I'm just going to give him more pie and blow jobs and we'll call it even ^_^

Woo-hoo!

2008-08-10T20:52:40Z

Soooo I'm finally all moved up to Sacramento! The only thing that sucks is I don't have my computer up and running yet, so I'm going to updating very little all this week. I'm on my grandparent's computer, but I prefer not to use it..

I am so happy to finally say goodbye to hellish Benicia. And crazy people :)

Catey, you really are the only reason for me to go back there at all.. cuz, I love you ^_^

rizzointhebox @ 2008-08-05T13:08:00

2008-08-05T20:51:55Z

I hate that feeling you get after you have a fight with someone and you feel like everyone suddenly turns against you and there's all these lies swirling around... It's a pretty shitty feeling. Lately I've been holding back with what I post in my entries because I'm afraid of people judging what they read.... but fuck it! It's my livejournal and this is what I have it for. And I'm going to celebrate my success here.

I recently got accepted to model for Gods Girls, along with another awesome friend of mine ;) I'm not going to disclose the name I chose for myself because I don't really want people looking me up... buuuuut

I am STOKED. This tiny window of opportunity has inspired me. It's been a year since I traded in my pointe shoes because I was ashamed of my body.. and suddenly I want to go back to dancing seriously. I have an incentive to take care of my body and better myself and I think that's a really positive aspect about the whole thing. I also have an outlet for my pinup/burlesque obsession.

So far all my pictures are amateur, and I'm excited to do my first professional set sometime in the near future. If any of you photographers would like to practice on me in the meantime I'd love to do some work :)

Moving all my stuff up to Sacramento today, coming back tomorrow and then driving up again on Friday. Then it's time to look for a job!

Some back-stabber is going around telling people I'm going to become a dancer.... Maybe I should just follow Brad's kind advice and become a "coke-head stripper" because I have family problems. Minus the coke, of course ;)

Yeah, that sounds like a GREAT plan. Thanks for suggesting it.

rizzointhebox @ 2008-07-28T18:57:00

2008-07-29T02:14:20Z

This weekend has been one big fun adventure.

Actually... it really sucked.

I hate losing friends. It feels kind of awful.. but sometimes it's really for the best.

I made the decision to tell Jamela that our friendship had come to a close, and that I can't speak to her anymore. I realize looking back that she never really treated me all that well... only wanted to hang out when it was convenient for her, only called when she needed something, talked crap about all her friends but then was really nice to their face..etc etc. Despite all this shit though, I still have fond memories of us. I guess that's what counts.

I also came to the realization that Brad is still... well, a tiny bit crazy. He hasn't changed much in the past year. When he gets angry he's still that abusive, manic-depressive, disconnected individual that I've seen before. The things he said to me were pretty messed up. Messed up enough to make me never want to see or hear from him ever again.

Yeeeeah.... on a lighter note:

I'm extremely happy about moving up to Sacramento. I really needed this.

Step Brothers was hilarious. You should all go see it.

Since I'm going to be living so close to the Sacramento airport, I want to come visit people!! *cough*Carly*cough*Amelia*cough*.. So lets make that happen ^_^

MY DAD IS A FUCKER!

2008-06-30T21:00:43Z

Seriously.

We got in this huge fight last night because I agreed to take someone's shift at work on Tuesday night, forgetting that he wanted me to go up to Sacramento and stay overnight for some family thing. When I told him I was working he completely flew off the handle. Like, screaming and cussing me out and telling me how much he hates me -off the handle. I wish I could videotape this shit, he's insane!

So I tell him that I'll get it covered instead. And I do get my shift covered. And after I go through all that trouble just to please his fucking ass, now he says that he doesn't want me there and that I can't go. Hahah, really? Honestly, it's like he's expecting me to be heartbroken that I can't come or something. So now I guess I just get the night and whole house to myself on Tuesday night. Not too shabby if you ask me.

But really, what a fucking child. I can't believe how volatile he is, this kind of behavior is bullshit. He's mad because I made a mistake and forgot his stupid plan, yeah I understand I made a mistake..... but I fixed it. Is fixing it not good enough?

I figure the only good things that have come out of this situation is that I now don't have to go and be annoyed by him the whole time AND I get a night off work. So why am I complaining about him being a dickhead?

I don't know. I shouldn't be. I'm just sick of him fucking with me all the time. I can't wait to FINALLY be rid of him. At least by the time August rolls around I'll have some peace.

Being related to someone like this is the purest form of torture. Nobody knows what it's really like.

rizzointhebox @ 2008-06-19T11:26:00

2008-06-19T18:34:07Z

My face is HUGE. Over the course of the day yesterday, it just kept progressively getting bigger. No matter how much ice I pressed onto my face, it still kept going. I woke up this morning and it still looks awful. It feels like the swelling is never going to go down.

I took some painkillers around 10pm and went to bed last night, only to wake up at 6 am today in absolute agony. I can take a lot of pain usually. But this.... this was just insane. My whole face was literally throbbing. Ryan ran downstairs and got my pills and some water. I took one of each, but it took so long for them to kick in I just started to cry. I had to crush up another half a pill and take it so that it would hit me faster. Luckily, it did and we were able to go back to sleep.

I am now crushing up my pain meds and taking them routinely every 3 to 4 hours at the very first hint of pain.

FUCK THIS

rizzointhebox @ 2008-06-17T19:12:00

2008-06-18T02:32:39Z

I got my wisdom teeth pulled out today at 1 pm. I was scared shitless but it really wasn't bad at all. The only thing I remember is having wires on me hooked up to a monitor, and they gave me a funny feeling shot in the arm. Then I the roomed started slowly spinning and the next thing I knew I was under a blanket in the recovery room. It really wasn't bad at all. I have an extreme fear of the dentist, and this was probably the best experience I've ever had. Even going in to get my teeth cleaned freaks me out! I wish I got drugs everytime I went.. haha.

Ryan came home with me, and when we got there Karina handed me a bouquet of stargazer lilies and a Glamour magazine. I love my sister, she knows how to put a smile on my face. Then Ryan came upstairs with me and we layed in bed. I dozed off a tiny bit then woke up and wanted to have sex. I must be insane....who wants to have sex after they got four teeth pulled and are loopy off of painkillers?

Alisa Esca-freakin-lante, that's who. And we were quite successful. Hahah. My lj entries are always full of tmi. But seriouosly, my libido is kind of ricidulous.

I'm going to go lay back down before I pass out. This vicodin is making it so I can't see straight.

Warning: Really mushy post

2008-06-16T07:20:51Z

Since I'd look like a crazy person if I ran down the street grabbing the shoulders of every person I see and yelling to them about how awesome my relationship is.... I will spill it on my livejournal. It's a good outlet.

Things with Ryan and I are going exceptionally well.

It's such a scary, powerful, amazing yet happy feeling when you're so in love with a person. It all unfolded so slowly.. I never thought we'd be where we are right now when we first started dating. He's been my best friend and has seen the best and the worst of me. We've been through some rough patches, but everything we've been through makes me so sure about how I feel about him. He told me he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. I feel the same way. I'll be the luckiest person in the world if I'm still in this state of absolute bliss 20 or so years down the road. We bring out the best in each other. And I really hope that we end up together in the end.. Nothing would make me happier.

I took a step back and read this entry and realize that it sounds so highschooler-ish and lame. But it doesn't feel that way. It's the truth, and it's real. I look back at every single past relationship in my life and the feelings were so different and naive.

It's just amazing. I never thought it would happen to me.

rizzointhebox @ 2008-06-02T20:05:00

2008-06-03T03:55:43Z

Corona Light is amazing. 99 calories in 12 ounces! Pretty awesome, I must say.

I'm so anxious to move out! It's not until the beginning of August and I already want to go to Ikea and buy room, bed, and bathroom stuff. Ah... I can't wait to be out of this crazy house.

I also can't wait for this lasagna that Ryan and I are making to be done..